A conversation with Dave Aguilera of Bleed The Dream

This is the original transcript of the interview, only minor editing has been applied for readability. This has been the basis for articles but has never been published in the original form.

Wortraub: This is your second album and your debut was connected to some hardships … so how was the work on this one?

Dave: I think with the second one, the only real stress we’d have was with finances. For the first we had about three and a half weeks to do it. We did not have a lot of sleep; we tried to just record it ñ non-stop. As far as the overall atmosphere, this album was definitely a lot more fun. On the first album not only our friend but our drummer suffered from cancer and we got to watch him go through the agony of this. It took the fun out of it, so to speak.

Wortraub: Did it feel strange to go on to this album without Scott?
Dave: Yes, it definitely did. Looking at the dreams, that we had it change a lot. I and Keith are still original members who started the band. It is not the same, but it is good, just different. The weirdest thing is still when we see our old videos.

Wortraub: Do you have the feeling that something is missing with the band?
Dave: No, it doesn’t feel like something is missing. If anything, when you deal with any kind of death, you are going to miss that person and that feeling is not going to go away. Music or not, Scott was one of our best friends and we miss him every day.

Wortraub: And for the band as a whole … did Tom as a replacement work out?
Dave: Tom definitely brought some new life into the band. We auditioned a lot. Ever since Scott got sick, we did not have a real drummer. We just had friends filling in for us. But when we had some time off, we decided, let’s audition for a new drummer. We looked at about forty drummers, but Tom was actually the first to come in. After we were all done, we called him back and it has been a lot of fun. He is the youngest guy in the band and for him it is the first record he has done that is in stores. When he enjoyed the band he had not toured worldwide yet, had never been overseas. For him and the band that meant a whole new life, because he was so excited and all.

Wortraub: How have you changed as a band after what happened with Scott?
Dave: No, it is actually the exact same way. Most of our songs start from a guitar riff that one of the guys brings in. We write everything as a band. A simple guitar riff, and then we start layering it from there. Basically all the same way it has always been.

Wortraub: And why did you choose to have another personal change? With Mark on vocals instead of Brandon ñ who is still in the bio that your label send out?
Dave: Over last few years we have been having some personal issues with Brandon and the band. Being a band is just like a family. You have to get along with each other. We have tried to patch those differences up, but they were not just personally, they were musically too. It felt like, three guys in the band were going in one direction and Brandon was going in another direction. The more we tried to pull together, the more it seemed like it was imploding on itself. So we decided to let it go. None of us were happy. Musically or personally. We just weren’t getting along. We tried to patch everything up, but it just did not work out. Like with anything in life. If you are not happy with it, then it is not worth it. On the other hand, we had toured with Mark’s old band, which had just broken up. And we knew, that Mark’s voice would go really well with the type of music that we wanted to do. So we made a decision. Not an easy one, but it had to be done and now we are happy, we did it.

Wortraub: Was there any pressure recording this album?
Dave: No, not at all. We felt, that on the first record we kind of threw all the songs together. We did not have a lot of time to write the record, we were still finding our own sound, trying to evolve. We were basically still figuring out who we were going to be in this big music world. Over the last few years we’ve seen a lot, done a lot and travelled the world. The situation with Scott also changed all of us, our personality and all. On this record we felt like, let’s do what we want to do and not give any pressure on having a hit single, being compatible to the radio or whatever. Let us just do what we do best. That is our mentality. That is what kept it fun and kept the stress down.

Wortraub: Is this a follow-up to the last album or does it more feel like a fresh start, like a debut album?
Dave: It feels more like a debut. When we talked to our fans we got this feeling as well, we are doing our first tour in this line up, presenting the new material. It almost feels like a debut album even though it is truly not. I mean, we have spent the last four years building a following, a fan base. But musically it feels like we are bringing something completely new and different to the table.

Wortraub: When reading up on you, the critics were always mentioning your DIY attitude … how does this work out for the second album?
Dave: I think when you are going to write music and you have a pre-conceived agenda. Like, we sold this many copies of the first, so we need to beat that or we need to make sure there are some pop songs in there or whatever. Whenever you have those kind of ideas before you go into recording, you feel like it limits you. Doing this record, we decided to do what we wanted to do. Hopefully, other people will like that also. We are trying to keep that true to ourselves kind of attitude. That is really the DIY. What you are doing for yourself is really controlling everything that you are doing. You are not allowing anyone to control you. You are not allowing them to make you the brand of the day. You use your own personal judgment. We do what we do and make the best of it.

Wortraub: So DIY is not doing it yourselves anymore but deciding what other people are allowed to do for you?
Dave: Exactly. One of the good things about being on a record label is that you do not have to do everything yourself anymore. That is the reality of it. There are people in the office doing it for you. There is the type of band that sits back and lets all their managers and agents make the decisions for them. Or they rely on them without really questioning. And then there is the type of bands who take it into consideration but in the end of the day still do what they think is right for them, whether it is correct or not. As long as it feels right to yourself, you got to do it, because you are your own greatest personal critic. If you are not happy, you should not do it.

Wortraub: Working with a producer legend like GGGarth and being signed to Warcon is not a compromise to that ethic?
Dave: The first thing I though when I heard the Garth wanted to do the record was: „Oh shit, Nu Metal band that is the last thing I want to sound like.“ Then I started thinking about it: „Wait, this guy has done so many amazing bands. He did „Mothers Milk“, he did Rage Against The Machine’s first record. So my first impression was wrong. As a producer all he really does it figure out what you are best at and then hones in on that and make your sound the best that it can be on print. First thing Garth said to us when we met him was „What do you guys want to sound like? What do you like?“ We did not even pull our instruments out on the first day, we just sat in a big circle and talked about our favourites. We really took the heart of that discussion, listened to it and created the record that we wanted to. That is a real producer’s job. That is what Garth did. He is old school, he knows it is more about the band than his own ego. It wasn’t about him. He said: „When you leave here, I am going to be doing another record, so I won’t be thinking about this one anymore. You guys are going to be thinking about this one for the rest of your lives. It is more important that you are happy than me.“ We took that to heart. It has the big Garth sound, the guitars and all. But we walked in with all the ideas done and already in our heads. We were very precise in how the things should come out.

Wortraub: Coming to „Killer Inside“ … are you afraid of some of the feelings in yourself?
Dave: Well, this is basically it with the lyrics. Mark has a pretty voice and we all knew that. So we said, we wanted to offset his voice with the music and thus we wanted to keep the lyrics as dark as we possibly could. We wanted to have the music on the dark side, so as to offset with the beautiful voice. So we told him to do what he wanted with the lyrics. There are no pre-conceived ideas about the lyrics or the style. That being said, he did not write about the usual rock’n’roll stuff like going out or breaking up with a girl. On this record he had the chance to dive deep into his own self and talk about issues that other people would not like to talk about. One of them being him going through a hard time. He was quitting drugs and getting clean. That is a dark period for anyone and he used it as a helper to come out of the closet. He is like anyone else, only he can bring it to paper and maybe help someone else with it. That is why he went down that road, writing more on the dark side. There are other songs on there, like relationship songs. But even these have a kind of twist on it, kind of dark with a more sadistic feel to it.

Wortraub: The lyrics betray a certain notion of us being responsible for hurting ourselves most of the time … there is a lot of hurt.
Dave: That is frustration. If you know you are doing something that you are not supposed to do. You are hurting yourself, in taking drugs you are doing this to yourself, you are hurting other people. That makes you frustrated with yourself because you constantly ask yourself: „why am I doing this?“ Also, you see other people around you doing the same things and you get frustrated with that, because no one is trying to help you. I grew up in L.A., I am from Hollywood and Mark lived in New York for the last ten years. Those are two very party-influenced cities. There is a lot of that going around, it is the norm and not looked down on. The parking lot song is about that, either city. It is about that.

Wortraub: So most of it is very introspective, pointing to the outside and blaming it for not helping …
Dave: Yeah, we recorded in Canada with Garth. It takes a ferry to get there. It is in the middle of nowhere. We recorded this record in the woods. It is a big startling change for a bunch of city kids. You are suddenly sitting in this cabin and there is nothing to do ñ no city and no place to party. Nothing but time to think about yourself and your life. That is where Mark wrote most of his lyrics. Being out there in the middle of the woods and having nothing to do but think about his life ñ where he has been and where he wants to go. That was the opportunity to finish the lyrics in this beautiful pristine place with all the problems of the city gone. That influenced the style of writing, gave it a twist. Nowhere to run, no escape from it. And it made him think of what his life would be when he got back. You only live a certain way when you are not around the „bad influence“, but what happens when you are back? When there is nothing around you trying to pull you to the dark side it is easier, but what when you get back to the city. With all the people around you not being a good influence. They are not helping you trying to do the right thing but the total opposite.

Wortraub: Sometimes we even go so far as to be in need of someone that „beats and blindfolds“ us? Is force needed, do we need a kick in the ass?
Dave: I think, everyone needs a kick in the ass sometimes. Even somebody who will be a positive influence on you. It is a problem of this day and age that we live in, that there are more bad influences than there are good ones. Being in the band is such a good influence for him, it gives him options. I mean, I choose not to use drugs and try to influence my friends of course. Keeping them from that road without forcing them. I try to help Mark with his issues. For him writing this record was a cleansing, he was facing up to his life. Talking about it helped him. Ever since we did the record it has been amazing. It was better than with Brandon, because we told Mark upfront, that he needed to be with us on this. And he was which Brandon never was. We did not want to tell either one, what to do, but it was necessary to live differently for the band and Mark wanted to do that. Brandon was not able to overcome his own issues.

Wortraub: Well, thank you for the interview.
Dave: Yeah, thanks. We are looking forward to coming to Europe in the fall. Make sure to be there and check it out. Bye.